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Mimii
06-05-2008, 09:16 PM
Suzette LeAnn Areal;A popular Asian girl,a little higher than middle class,but not rich,and she is anything but mean.As her life changes,Suzette learns to savor the happy moments,deal with the bad,& find her "real" friends.Yea,it's your typical plot.
Chapter 1:
"Mom! Where's my blue Abercrombie tank?!" Suzette frantically searched her room.She just HAD to wear blue today.It was a Friday,and she was going on a date with Jimmy.Briana,Darlene,Ashley,& Jackie told her she had looked seductive & beautiful in the sky blue Abercrombie tank when they came over.."Honey,it's right here where you left it yesterday night!" Suzette ran downstairs,thanked her mom,and ran back upstairs."Oh shoot.Was I going to wear a skirt with it?" Suzette had a blankout for all of 10 seconds,and said "Oh yea!".She slipped in the tank and jean skirt,and headed downstairs for a 10 minute breakfast.She always had to have at least a 5 minute breakfast.It gave her face a liveliness , and made her feel happy.
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"Oh my gosh! Are you , like , serious?!" cried Briana. "Well duh,why would I lie to you?" replied Darlene."But he ,like, told me he loves me!" "Oh yea right.You know Brandon was never your type anyways," retorted Darlene."Ughh! I'm so gonna get Cheyenne !" The two droned on and on about the other group.Unlike most schools,Riverview High School had 2 popular groups.The Barbies and The Cools.Suzette didn't particularly like the two names but she would have rather been a Cool over a Barbie anyday.And besides,who was she to rename the groups?Oh right,just the "leader" of the Cools."Oh well.Whatever,I mean they're just freaking NAMES." As the three walked to school & picked up Jackie & Ashley on their way,Suzette had one of her rare reflective thoughts."Gosh.I feel so safe;so protected here..I mean nobody can take me out of the Cools..can they?.No,of course they can't!..But then,Ashley & Jackie are a pair, and Darlene & Briana were one too.Who did she have?Of course not..They all liked her.Whatever.This is a waste of my time." Suzette tried to forget her doubts,but the seed was already planted in her mind.


Song for this chapter:
None.




Author's Note-1st Chapter:
The first chapter isn't particularly a good chapter,because I don't really know how to start it off.Constructive criticism is always welcome,but make sure it's CONSTRUCTIVE.
3+ good comments & I'll continue.If not,well there's the end of my writer's career ;].Yea,I know,I probably made a whole bunch of mistakes,and will continue but when I say constructive criticism,I don't mean "you spelled teach wrong".I mean like "You should use less quotes" or something like that,so please don't point out my mistakes.I know I've made them.By the way,I have songs for every chapter,except for this one & maybe the second one[if people want me to write a second one]





Chapter 2:

Suzette raced home with her "clique." They started laughing as Jackie fell,and then Suzette fell from laughing too hard,& pretty soon,everybody was on the ground.[I]Now this is what I love about my friends.They're so fun!
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"Suzette!Come here honey!"Suzette's mother's voice was that fake cheery voice..which usually meant something was wrong."Honey!Sit down!So,how was school?" That fact that her mother asked her how school was worried Suzette even more.Her mother never had asked her before.Yeah,she occasionally said that she would always be there for Suzette,and that Suzette could tell her anything and everything..but never had she asked how school was."Oh it was fine,Mom.& we both know that there's something.You didn't think I'd know,even though I've known,no,LIVED,with you for 14 years?Mom.What's wrong?Seriously!"
-Suzette's mother started/starts crying uncontrollably at this point-
"MOM! STOP SCARING ME!!WHAT HAPPENED?! It can't really be THAT bad can it?????Come on Mom! Please..stop scaring me..Mom,please.."
"Well honey..your father..he's..he's.."
"What Mom?What about Dad??"
"He lost his job!" cried Suzette's mother,rushing the words,as if rushing it would make it less painful.
-Suzette's mother bursts into tears again-
"Well Mom,he can get a new job right?
"No,honey.He's also..also.."
-Suzette's mother started shedding tears again,even harder than the last two times combined.-


Author's Note:
Okay,I PROMISEPROMISE that the next chapter will have a song.I wanted to stop here & see if it was much suspense.:/. Not much to say about this chapter.Oh,& next time,I'll post the chapter on a new post & I'll link to it on this post.I don't want to make this post longer than it already is x].Okay,same as before,3[+?as if] comments to continue.Thanks for reading :]

LostProphetss
06-05-2008, 09:22 PM
Not Bad :)

Mimii
06-06-2008, 03:07 PM
:[
Anymore good comments? :/

SkyRocket
06-09-2008, 05:50 PM
I really do like it ( and I'm not just saying that ) Can't wait for the next chapter.

Mimii
06-09-2008, 05:54 PM
1 more good comment[oh please oh please oh PLEASE !]
& I'll continue.

xOxBeLiEvErxOx
06-09-2008, 05:56 PM
It's a bit hard to read. Everytime there's dialogue it's supposed to be a new paragraph..or another line in this case. Keep writing though, I can't wait to read more.

Wonder
06-09-2008, 06:10 PM
wooot! :]
Its a very good plot. Can't wait to see the next chapter!

Mimii
06-09-2008, 06:31 PM
YAY ! 3 whole POSTS !
WOOOOOT ! NEW CHAPTER COMING UP !!!!!! x]
Sorry.I'm just excited I get to "continue my writing career".
Whooooppppppeeee!



New Chapter posted :]
Please remember to read Author's Note,every single time.Important info x]

Wonder
06-10-2008, 12:40 PM
Woot! Great second chapter! :D i already have an idea whats gonna happen next! woooot! :D

CarrieMileyCeline
06-10-2008, 01:09 PM
MORE!
--Shortness--

Mimii
06-10-2008, 03:05 PM
1 more person please x]

Wonder,you're being good at your wondering/imagining skills,but beforehand,I'll tell you he doesn't die.
But that's only in the next chapter.Who knows what I have planned?

x]

Oh,and just so you guys know,I'm writing this as I go along.No planning x]

BlueIPodChick
06-10-2008, 10:40 PM
Awesome!!!! I. Want. More!!!!!
Your Really REALLY Good!!!

Mimii
06-11-2008, 10:45 PM
Done ;]
Okay.I'll edit this post in a second and write a new chapter x]
UGGGGGGGH.I'm SOOO SORRY !
But I wrote my new chapter,and then when I went to post,apparently,VFKF had signed me out,so it was all lost:[
But I have to go now so sorry :l.

Mimii
06-25-2008, 06:11 PM
Sorry for double post.
But mods;
please close.
I don't like this story anymore x]